Deflection

As known by the military staff and tough in the American Legion College, the three Ls in leadership stands for Listen, learn, and lead. If a person in a leadership roll does not listen and learn, they lead with chaos. Although the three Ls are far reaching in leadership, it is also a major part of relationships with friends and family.

A good leader will always take time to listen to the people around you them and learn what people will have to say. They will ask questions to understand where the person is coming from when the other person is talking, even if the leader does not agree with the person talking. Most people want to know that they have been heard, even if the decision does not go their way. The leader will learn from what the people are stating, and learn from relavant documents to the topic/topics that are relevant to the decision that they have to make. Once that they have enough information to make a qualified decision, they will make their decision known. If a leader does not take the time to lead with good information, they lead by chaos, and everyone is offended by their decision/decisions. In some cases, although the leader may be the quietest one in the room, others will state that they did all of the talking, especially if everyone agrees with the decision.

A good leader is calm, even in frustration situations, since they are looking for solutions and not to criticize, especially those affected when others are around. This stoicism has been used by George Washington and Queen Elisabeth II, in the modern world. They are looked up to by the people that they are leading, since the people that they are leading know that the leader understands them. People take comfort when the leader knows their feelings, even if the leader does not agree with their feeling.

It may be unfortunate, but most of us have been around leaders that lead with chaos, since they will not take the time to listen and learn. People do not enjoy leaders that are not prepared and will not willing to listen and learn, since these type of leaders drag to whole group down. And, probably the most frustrating part of being around a poor leader, they do not understand that they are not prepared for a given topic, and do not know that they are not listening or learning. There are leaders that are so arrogant that they cannot comprehend what they are putting their group through chaos.

We may refering to leaders in the work place, but taking the lead with friends and family is more difficult, since we do not want to lose our friends, and we do not want to alienate our family. As with friends, we often do not know where they are coming from, since we have not been with them is birth. So, when there is a problem, care must be taken to understand where they are coming from before making a decision. It can be a tight line to follow.

As with family, we have been with them since birth. We may think that we know where they are coming from, but even identical twins have different options. As time goes by, we all change in our thoughts and feelings, and it is hard for family members to understand that other family members as we drift in to different directions. Since family members can take ownership in family possessions and values, the can be deep rooted feelings in family members. As we were growing up, we were tough to accept the different feelings in family members, but today, it is more easy for family members to separate, based on the feelings in our society at this time.

Christian values do lead to a quality life, with pastors mainly preaching from the portion of the Bible that people should work there disagrees out between themselves. Although this does work for most situations, it does not work all situations, since it is more difficult to deal with people with mental illness or personality disorders. In these types of situations, it is better to be stoic like Jesus was when the Pharisees presented Jesus to Pontius Pilate, but stand up for the truth as Jesus did in front of Pilate. Therefore, when a person is in the care of a pastor, the pastor will use the situation that Jesus was in to guild the member/members through the issues of mental health or personality disorders to get them through their current situation.

Being a Christian is a blessing and a curse, with many Christians being well versed in the Bible. When a Christian is having problems with someone that will not listen or learn, they are well versed Christian may not listen and learn what their friend is going through before they state that they need to work the issues out between the two that are not getting alone. Giving advice from the Bible without understanding the problem that your Christian friend is going through, it can be very hurtful, and can destroy the relationship. As we heard growing up, it is better to walk in the moccasins of another person before giving judgment. Or, as with this essay, it is better to listen and learn before giving advice, even if you are a Christian.

When a Christian finds out that their friend is have an issues with someone else, it is important that they listen, learn, and try to understand the problem. They should recommend to their friend that they should see their pastor. If their friend is seeing a pastor, they should take comfort knowing that they are seeing a pastor.

This essay is only reaching an overview of the three Ls, since this topic is far reaching the world that we live in at this time. There are plenty of examples of people walking through life not listening and learning. As for this essay, it is important for the readers to understand that people that do not listen and learn lead with chaos. If we understand the reason why people are leading with chaos, hopefully we will find comfort knowing that they are refusing not to listen and learn before making a decision.

Roger